Domestic Violence: Dead men do tell tales!

(CMR) Last night we had a domestic assault victim, Sandy Clunis, joined our program to discuss her vicious attack several weeks ago that left her in the ICU. Clunis's husband Davian/Kenniel Thompson attacked her at her workplace and then took his own life shortly thereafter.

One thing that struck us as obvious is that people take sides in these situations. Friends and family members quickly align themselves with the party in the relationship they were friends with. Everyone appears ready, to tell the truth, and blame the other side.

Thompson's siblings in Jamaica have been quick to say that Clunis was using him and placed financial demands he could not meet. For her part, Clunis said it was the opposite. She was attempting to help Thompson despite his multiple extramarital affairs. He was cash strapped and wanted desperately to remain in the Cayman Islands is what she shared on last evening's show. She explains he had no valuable skill, education or much else to offer an employer.

The narrative is as old as Cayman and Jamaica. Jamaican men have a history of using women here to improve their lives and provide for their families. Sadly, many had little to offer in return and the new breed believes they can also continue have side chicks whilst reaping the benefits of a marriage of convenience.

Clunis admits that after only 5 months of dating they rushed into marriage to assist him with being able to find employment on the island. Clearly immigration has their hands full of these sorts of arrangements. Some claim he was paying her to marry him, but there was no evidence provided of that.

CMR knows neither party it but does appear that her version of events has some merit. Most Jamaicans come to Cayman for a better life and great job opportunities. That's an indisputable fact. They are not the only ones – most foreign workers are here for better opportunities and on the face of it, there's no issue with that. Except when they use the system and people to achieve that goal.

Clunis, a Jamaican herself could very well understand the struggle. She shared that he only traveled once in almost 4-years that he was in the Cayman Islands. This alone is peculiar – most Jamaicans return home at least once per year for Christmas to spend the time with family. It seems likely he could not afford the trips or didn't want any additional pressures placed on him when he returned to his homeland. She presented a picture of a desperate man that had too many people expecting his financial assistance.

Commentators on the show were harsh. They included Thompson's sisters and multiple girlfriends. They called Clunis, a victim, all sorts of names and blamed her for the actions of a grown man. People even messaged claiming he was murdered!

This actually doesn't surprise us as with domestic violence and abuse most victims are blamed – particularly in the Caribbean. Many feel that victims drove their perpetrators to assault or kill them. We are too quick to look for a reason why it happened and it doesn't matter in the minds of many that no one can ultimately control another person.

The dialogue is disturbing but all too familiar – it was her fault! He was driven to it by her. She was using him and so his assault on her is justified.

How exactly was she using him? For sex? Money? They have thrown both into the mix. There's no real evidence that she was using him – except that was the narrative that he perpetrated among his friends, lovers and family. They have provided no real evidence except a few snapshots of conversations where he claims he was having a hard time coping.

One friend even shared they told him things could end up this way because they were constantly reading of such murder/suicide cases in Jamaica. He had spoken to others about his intentions of killing her and possibly himself – yet they still blame her.

Most viewers accepted there are always two sides to a story and the truth can often be found somewhere in the middle. May also accept that dead men don't tell tales. – an old adage that no longer holds true.

Turns out dead men can tell tales when they have left behind a history of messages and voice notes. His messages are beyond telling. They show a man that is verbally and emotionally abusive. A man that has no respect for a woman who was old enough to be his mother; but chose to be his wife. A man that was more than capable of taking care of himself – he clearly wasn't being used by anyone at all unless he wanted to be.

This is a compilation of audio notes that clearly demonstrate Davian/Kenniel was no victim! Anyone who still believes that has a lot of issues they need to address.